The Giardia Diet®
(RIO DE JANEIRO, Aug. 16, 2011) — From the geniuses behind The Salmonella Diet® and Montezuma's Revenge®: The Giardia Diet®
Lose unwanted fat and/or muscle faster than with any other fad diet on the market. The Giardia Diet® is cheap, easy and foolproof. Eat whatever you want so long as you follow a few simple guidelines. Our motto: You can't resist the urge to purge!
How The Giardia Diet® Works
The Giardia Diet® is truly an adventurer's diet. If you love trying strange food in weirder places, hiking in remote locales, and generally don't like to cook or wash fruits and vegetables (so time consuming!) but love to eat them, then this diet is for you!
Phase 1: Kickstarting The Giardia Diet® and Weight Loss
This initial kickstarting phase (7-14 days) can be difficult for some, but it's smooth sailing after Phase 1. Finally relax in bed. Call in sick for a few days. You probably won't be able to get up anyway!
Phase 2: Lose, lose and lose!
During Phase 2 you'll be losing weight faster than you can say "Where's the bathroom?" in a new language. During a period of 2-4 weeks, you'll feel like it's no more difficult than a few quick trips to the bathroom per hour! You'll be shocked at how much you can lose in such little time!
Phase 3: Maintain for Life
Phase 3 is all about loving the new you and taking more trips with your newfound friends to ensure you keep the pounds off forever!
The Giardia Diet Book™
If you follow along with the book, you'll find step-by-step instructions to increase your chances of weight loss, recommended restaurants for your area and clinically tested recipes that can have you dropping the pounds fast.
Recipes include: No-wash Salads, Dirty Sink Pasta, Lickin'-Under-Your-Fingernails Hummus Spread and River Water Smoothies
Restaurant information includes: You'll receive ideas for all kinds of hotspots and tips on how to order in any restaurant. Our time-honored tips include: ordering raw salads, drinking the salsa liquid from the bottom of the bowl, eating as much raw/undercooked street food as possible.
Giardia Diet® Getaway Trips™
We also have built-in rewards to make sure you're motivated and always on your toes. We've partnered up with some fantastic, local and cheap travel companies to help you drop the weight, meet people and visit exotic places like South America and Africa (select countries only). Our travel companies' all-inclusive meals save you money by skipping unnecessary food-washing practices (plates, hands, feet). We also don't demand unnecessary certifications for things like health and safety.
You'll be staying in rugged locations and roughing it on once-in-a-lifetime adventures. And just think of how awesome you'll look!
Giardia Diet® Bonus Activities
We also have great exercises for when you're at home and looking for some motivation. Exercises include:
- Foraging for food near dirty water
- Taking hikes and drinking from streams where others wouldn't dare!
- Exploring fetid puddles after rainfall
- Eating lettuce without washing it!
- Not rehydrating yourself after a particularly satisfying purge and instead taking yourself out for a few martinis. You know you deserve it!
The Giardia Diet® Attache Case™
Along with The Giardia Diet® book, you will be sent an attache case free of charge which will arm you with all you'll need to follow the diet effectively. The Attache Case™ includes:
- Emergency Rehydration Salts
- Water from The Giardia Diet®'s own mud puddles in Cusco, Peru
- A scented bathroom candle
- Your first roll of toilet paper
- A sample-pack of Advil
- Your own Giardia Diet® bathroom sign that reads: You Deuce, You Lose! The Giardia Diet®
- The Splatter Cover™, perfectly for safely reading The Giardia Diet® book!
Popular Destinations for the Giardia Diet®
- Peru, Mexico, and virtually anywhere in Central and South America (restrictions on Argentina, Brazil and Chile may apply)!
- Five star hotels in select locations in India!
- Anywhere where street food containing uncooked vegetables is prevalent!
You can also increase your chances of weight loss with these other diets!
The Giardia Diet® is easy and effective, but also flexible for those who may want to follow other diets simultaneously for even more amazing results! The Giardia Diet® is compatible with:
- The Salmonella Diet®
- The Raw Food Diet (while traveling in select countries)
- Select parasitic diets
Side effects for The Giardia Diet® include abdominal pain, diarrhea, gas and bloating, headache, loss of appetite, burps that smell like rotten eggs, low-grade fevers, nausea, swollen or distended abdomen, or vomiting. The Giardia Diet® is not for those taking antibiotics or The Hollywood Diet® (aka The Laxative Diet).